Travel Woes and Lessons Learned

As a follow up to my offical boycott of air travel, I thought it’d be useful to post this message I sent to a few friends of mine back in July after getting stuck overnight in Cincy. Edited slightly for language, I thought some of the lessons learned might be useful to anyone who hasn’t yet joined my boycott 🙂

There are some people, places or things that are just cursed. No two ways about it. For some people it rains when they go on vacation, for others their team always loses when they go to the game.

But my problem is a lot more inconvenient than that. After being stranded in Cincinatti last night, returning from a business trip in Dallas [derogatory comment on Dalls weather in July removed] and spending a lovely evening at the ant infested Radisson hotel, I’ve now been stranded at airports 4 times in the past 6 months (Chicago, Salt Lake City, Cincinatti, and Philadelphia), and delayed and/or cancelled maybe 20 or 30 more times.

The obvious response to this statement would be that I live in an area of the country with [crappy] weather, and hence should expect this sort of thing, but it doesn’t seem to matter. Orlando? Been [inconvenienced]. Denver? Ditto. Atlanta? Yup. Chicago? Well, ok, Chicago’s the worst damn airport in the country. But whether it’s Boston or San Fran, whatever plane I’m on gets [delayed] one way or another.

It’s reached new heights in recent months, as with perfect weather and no mechanical troubles, I got delayed in Denver with one I’d never heard before – “The ATC computer can’t generate our flight plan.” Net on that one? 2 hrs on the tarmac. Sweeeeeeeet.

You name the problem, I’ve had it. Busted fuel pumps, engine oil pressure problems (one while in flight), [malfunctioning] avionics modules, landing gear poking through the cabin, missing crew members, problems with cabin air pressure, mysterious warning lights, thunderstorms, fog, hail, snow, ice, even a broken seat.

It’s gotten so bad that I sort of expect it now, and when travelling I make sure I have all of the airline numbers available for when they [inconvenience] me.

So anyway, my advice to all of you?

1. Most important, never, ever fly on the same flight as me

2. When you get stranded, call the airline while you’re in line at the counter – you often get through much quicker – the # is almost always on the ticket jacket you get

3. If you do get stranded, don’t hesitate for the hotel option – they fill up quickly

4. As far as paying for the hotel, it goes like this: if it’s mechanical, they pay. If it’s weather, you pay, usually a somewhat reduced rate.

5. When there are no hotels available, look for movable bench seats at the terminal to make a fort

6. Try and bring a t-shirt and your dop kit in a carry-on so at least you can clean yourself up a bit if [when, in my case] you get stuck

7. If you’re going to a major airport, be sure and ask if the airline you’re on will reprotect you. Many times they’ll just look for the earliest available flight they have, but they should look for the earliest available flight on any carrier because you might have a better option. Some airlines like AirTran, however, have no such deals so there is no reprotection.

And that’s it, hope this helps some of you avoid my usual fate.

So for those of you who haven’t joined the train revolution, I hope that this is of some service to you.